Monday, September 19

Everything you do makes it easy to fall in love with you

"Even while playing at Real Madrid, Alonso has declared himself a Liverpool supporter and returns to watch games at Anfield when his schedule allows. He was quoted in The Times Online in 2011 as saying: "I am still a Liverpool fan and will be forever, absolutely" and that he will raise his Liverpool-born son as a Red supporter."

I wonder how LFC would be right now if we still had Xabi Alonso.

What if Torres and Meireles didn't leave? I also wonder how it feels to support a team that almost never loses. Yeah, I'm talking about Manchester United.

My favourite MU player? Javier Chicharito Hernandez!!! :D

So qqqqqqq. :D

Gets me frustrated to watch football games most of the time (seeing as how Liverpool played this week and the week before) but it does take my mind off most other things.

I didn't go to school at all last week. Why? Because I attended this camp at Pangkor for four days. 256 students from all over Malaysia, including Sabah and Sarawak. All in all, it was a good experience and I met so many nice people. Learnt a lot. No, not from the talks I was supposed to learn from (spent nearly all six talks sleeping!), but from the people I met there. The different dialects, the way of dressing, the different cultures, everything. So many memories to laugh and tell le Wonderm8s about.

I'm sick now, and gave school a miss today. I've been sick since Thursday actually. The only plus side to this is that I can swallow pills now. I actually really can! Huge accomplishment.

Went to Qeel's open house on Saturday, it was so nice to see everyone! Even if it was only for a short while. I actually want a few more days off school, but that doesn't seem so likely.

Everyone, go watch the music video of How to Love. Nearly cried.
I like Jason Chen and Sam Tsui's covers. :)

I guess I should go rest again now. Can't get any studying done with how I'm feeling right now.

Sunday, September 11


That first part there. You know, it isn't easy reading so much hate on your religion being posted all around the internet. Tell me, how would you feel if every other religion said that about yours? You wouldn't like it. But what can you do? Nearly everything you say in your religion's defense will only get hate again in return. All you can do is pray that one day, they truly see the truth. Breaks my heart every time someone says something like that. 

"Muslims are terrorists."

Everyone is entitled to their own opinions, but it downright hurts when the majority's opinion revolves around Muslims being terrorists. That's also where discrimination takes place.

"Hate the man, not the religion."

He was a terrorist. He represented himself and what he believed in; which of course, was not the right thing.
He does not represent the rest of us. In our religion, we believe violence will never solve anything. In any religion, violence will never solve anything.

This really touched me though.

Ten Years Later: A Tribute 9/11
My favorite 9/11 tribute in New York City can be found in Bryant Park. 2,819 empty chairs on the lawn facing the site where the World Trade Center once stood, one chair for every life lost. The number of empty chairs captures the enormity of the lives lost and the stark emptiness of it just drives home the point that I hope is never forgotten. 2,819 people were here one moment and gone the next. 2,819 went to work or boarded a plane one morning ten years ago thinking it would be another ordinary day and they never came home.

Don't get me wrong, I truly feel sorry for the 2, 819 people who lost their lives because of this incident. In fact, my family does have somewhat something to do with the incident. (Click here to read)

"Dear America, your 9/11 is our 24/7. Sincerely, Palestine."

But don't you feel sorry for the hundreds of thousands of innocent people in Palestine who die everyday?

If I was a flower growin' wild and free, all I'd want is you to be my sweet honeybee

I laughed so hard reading the textversation between Nadeem (Hilman's friend) and Mommy. Too cute. As for the first screenshot, super fail moment for Ayah hahahaha.

I'll be going to Pulau Pangkor tomorrow until Thursday. Sounds fun huh? Unfortunately it's not for a holiday, it's for this Kem Pengurusan. The itinerary is full of talks and talks and talks, there's hardly any outdoor activities. Good side is, I'll have Azrianna, Shashee and Carlos! Hopefully I'll meet more people I know there, and also make new friends. Oh and the next day after I come back is Hari Malaysia, which means it's a public holiday! That would also mean I'd be absent from school for 5 days straight, which is something I've never done before. Excited. Hehehe.

Exams are nearing and I need to buck up.

Until the next post! :)

Saturday, September 10

Thursday, September 8

He was like a fake friend who warms you up and takes you in

I had an emotional breakdown last night. That was the first and worst one in a long, long time. I don't know why it happened, it just did. It felt relieving to let it all out since I've been keeping it in for some time now. Right now, I'm feeling much better. I can still feel that something isn't right. Maybe it'll happen again tonight? Who knows. Lately I've been so optimistic (compared to how I was before), and I've been taking things so positively. Until last night. Who am I, anyway? I don't matter to anyone. Maybe I can be a good companion, but I don't see myself as someone other people would miss when I'm gone. I guess it's just me. I hope it's just me.

I deactivated Facebook and deleted the Twitter applications on my phone. This is probably temporary though. Maybe what I see on those two sites is what made me so down? God knows.

So, I was talking about this with Nad at school earlier. I've never lost anyone close to me. I was thinking about it the other day too. I really haven't. I don't know how it feels like and I don't know what to expect when it happens. Both my parents and my siblings are well, thankfully. So are my maternal grandparents. I lost my paternal grandfather exactly two months before my first birthday, so I was too young to feel anything. I've been living with my paternal grandmother my whole life. All my close relatives are well and healthy. I know I shouldn't be thinking about this, but how can I not? Everyone will die one day. And you know what would hurt most? When someone dies unexpectedly. Heart attacks, car accidents and all that.

Moving on, 2nd change this year?
I have stopped swearing. :)
This was my New Year's resolution many consecutive years ago, but of course it never worked. Until this year. I saw this picture sometime in January which really changed everything. I think I still have it in my phone or old laptop somewhere. I do admit I may have accidentally said bad words, but Alhamdulillah, not more than 10 times this year, I'm confident to say. Amazing, isn't it? Whoever reading this might think it's stupid, but I'm pretty happy with myself. Kinda teaches me to really watch what I say. Now, I don't even want to type bad words.

I've been thinking a lot about everything lately. I went home (after four months) a few days before Raya, and I came across my photo albums when I was a baby. I swear I was cute. I don't know what happened. And all the photos were taken in England, when I stayed there for two years since my birth. Imagine if I led that kind of lifestyle now. Also, I was browsing through my friends in UK's Facebook profiles. I think... I miss it. I miss living there. I miss Newcastle. I never really felt like I did. Maybe because I lived there for only a year from October 2003 to October 2004. Never really felt attached to anyone. I guess somewhat know how Ikha and Adani feel. They stayed there for years and years, so I can just imagine what it must be like for them. I miss the education system there. And the lifestyle I led too. Of course life was simpler when I was nine. On spring mornings, I'd walk to school with Mommy and my siblings, passing by the houses which had beautiful gardens. The flowers, the trees, the air, everything. During summer, I'd play with the other kids outside at the playground. We explored the neighbourhood on our bicycles. When it was autumn, everywhere was... beautiful. Covered with red leaves, all trees bald for that season of three months. School was good too. Recess (I think it was called playtime there) was for an hour, half the time spent in the cafeteria and the other half playing in the field. Hula hoops, footballs, skipping ropes, everything. Even assembly wasn't boring. I actually liked the hymns they sang, which I sang along to as well. Every week we had Show and Tell. During winter, the snow was always wet, and wasn't dry or heavy enough for us to play with and make snowmen, unless we were lucky. Shows on TV- I still remember Dick and Dom in da Bungalow. I remember my first favourite band was Busted, followed by McFly. I bought issues of Smash Hits which I still have now. Sleepovers at Ella's and Katie's, going to Josh's, Jonny's, Esme's, Ella's, Katie's after school for tea. Walking home to my friends' houses for projects or to read books or play the XBox. Visits to the library to borrow books and meet authors who visited sometimes. Garage sales and all the things we bought there. Not to forget the Malaysian families we made friends with there. We even went to Scotland together, a roadtrip, about three to four families. Lake District, all the mountains and beautiful sceneries which I didn't appreciate so much back then. I got a scooter which is collecting dust at home right now, which I played with nearly every single day after school with my friends from the neighbourhood. I learnt skateboarding too! Not actual skateboarding of course. I always saw the big kids skate at night outside my house, down the pretty steep hill. I played with Nazran's skateboard, sitting on it and going down the hill, doing little tricks (more of my own tricks). After some time Ayah even bought me my own skateboard, which too is at home somewhere. I also went to Alnwick Castle! Which was where they filmed some scenes in Harry Potter. Pretty cool. Also, my second trip to Disneyland Paris. I still have my autograph book somewhere. Barbecues, parties, dinners, everything. I even remember my farewell party. Mommy played my Busted CD on the radio. I had it at Giant's Den. Everything's suddenly so clear now. I really wish I can go back someday, before high school there ends. I'd love to meet everyone again. I'd love to catch up with my old friends and meet their friends. I don't know if I would be welcomed but I would really love to go again someday. Maybe, just maybe, one day, I will.

Monday, September 5

You hurt me, but do I deserve this?


So Raya break's over and today was the first day back to school.
Raya was good, slightly different than past years' celebration though. Food getting better and better. :D

School was quite dull today. In addition to Interact Club stress, I now have to worry about Editorial Board too. Finance segment! Anything to do with finance is tough. :( It'll all be worth it, I hope.

Mommy and Ayah have been more strict with me recently. I guess it's good, since I've actually been doing my homework lately. The amount of homework teachers give is crazy, I tell you.


Now, the actual purpose of me writing this post. I've changed this year. Some ways bad, others good. I really hope for me it's been more good changes than bad, but I'm not one to have a say on it.

Since I've been blogging a lot lately, I'll talk about it before I start studying for finals and lose my mojo after.

I've started watching more football! I've always supported Liverpool FC (thanks to my dad), but I only started watching all their games last year. Before that, I'd be the one getting drinks for my dad in the kitchen while he watches the game. I've also been watching other games like MUFC, AFC, THFC, etc.! Not bad, I guess. Honestly better than wasting my youth away always going online.

That's one change for now! I'll keep posting at the end of every entry. :)

You'll Never Walk Alone

Friday, September 2